AbezAbez Is... 50% White, 50 % Pakistani, Muslim Hijab-wearing type female, Daughter of Momma, Sister of Owlie Wife of HF, Momma of Khalid, a special little boy with Autism, and Iman, a special little girl with especially big hair, Writer, Graphic Designer, Editor, Freelancer, Blogger, Inhaler of Chocolate
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My Husband, who never updates!

Mona, who I don't visit enough

Hemlock, who I don't hug enough

Baji, the orginal robot monkey pirate

Prometheus, who buts brains to blog about Autism

Socrates, a blogger with Asperger's

Jo, a funnier Autism mom with a great blog

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ASAT- Assosciation for Science in Autism Treatments

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My Cousin- really, he's my cousin.  Wish he would update more.

 
 
 
 

Friday, January 23, 2009

16 Things You Never Wanted to Know, but too bad. So There.

1. I have a hard time filling out these ‘Random Things About Me’ lists. Even now I’m very self conscious about what I type here. Half of the time I worry about being shamelessly self-aggrandizing, the other half I worry that being normal may be seen as a deliberate attempt to be ‘lookit me, I’m so righteously humble.’ Apparently,

2. I over analyze. Or perhaps, I’m guilty of exposing myself by the lens through which I fear being seen.

3. I’m worried about being seen as arrogant or fake. One then wonders, is that because I am either

4. Secretly very arrogant or

5. Secretly very fake? I hope that I am neither, but I recognize that my personality harbors elements of both. Compare this to being told that:

6. I channel pre-school teacher. Someone I love told me that once, and I was hurt by that. I wasn’t sure why, I just knew that was an incorrect analysis of what I was, and realizing the incongruence between my inside (Abez Soup) and my outside (Preschool Teacher?) made me feel incredibly artificial.

7. I hate pretending.

8. I’m wondering where I’m going with this, and whether I’m exposing way too much of myself instead of just filling out sixteen silly things like

9. I once met Morgan Freeman and

10. I own silver sneakers.

Pretending is a kid in camo pants. Being is a soldier in camo. My preschool teacher exterior is not the candy coating, it’s the work of years of nafs-beating, lip-biting, hard-earned restraint. 11. I am not pretending to be nicer than I am, I am being nicer than I want to be, given that I am

12. Impatient

13. Self-Righteous and

14. Naturally inclined to vengeance. My façade is not to keep the light of prying eyes out, it’s to keep the darkness restrained within.

I think I’ve lost direction on this. Also, this may be way more than anyone has ever wanted to know about me. (So, did I tell you about my sneakers yet?) I think this meme and the preschool teacher comment just happen to come at the same time, and when I sat down to fill out that one silly list, I came up with this silly one instead.

What’s the moral of this story? You might not want to dismiss “nice people” you meet as being one-dimensionally Good, any more than you should be absolutely certain that patch of leaves isn’t a commando.

15. I talk too much.

16. I rearrange the furniture every time HF goes on a bidness trip. Where’s your sofa now, HA!

5 Comments:

At 23/1/09 3:56 AM, Blogger Waleed said...

You're oodles more genuine then you realize. And given how well I know you, you should just accept that :)

 
At 23/1/09 3:52 PM, Blogger Owl said...

Meh. We're all mad.

 
At 29/1/09 2:46 PM, Blogger Mona said...

MORGAN FREEMAN?!
I bought a new bag and it's adorable. You have to see it!

 
At 3/3/09 7:20 PM, Anonymous Amy/UmmAdam said...

i am new to your blog and i just love what you have written here... :) And for what its worth: i also rearrange furniture ;)

 
At 15/3/09 1:43 AM, Blogger American Muslima Writer said...

Whoa where has the time gone! i don't knwo why I haven't been around lately but I was so glad to catch up with your life and see your new header and they still look so darn cute! Congrats for Iman crawling and about to go into full mode cruising! More congrats for Khalid for his blue squares, hat, and OKAY!!!! Good your husband calmed them at the masjid!

I like ur term Nurse too for Ruth, I will read on about her introduction. Gives her more dignity than the other names.

It's a shame you can't take Ruth AND Iman with you to Dubai for more family time. But I understand you have to do what you can for now :)

LOL@ not just leaves... I'm sure you're an awesome multi-fauceted (sp) person and just because some don't see that you don't have to think less of yourself. I can tell from your blog you are one seriously intelligent and witty and AWESOME person. I'd love to meet you someday. Sometimes I wish I LIVED in ABUDhabi with all of you bloggers out there. Instead of Al-Ain.

Love to you and your family, brandy (Aminah-Zahira)

 

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