AbezAbez Is... 50% White, 50 % Pakistani, Muslim Hijab-wearing type female, Daughter of Momma, Sister of Owlie Wife of HF, Momma of Khalid, a special little boy with Autism, and Iman, a special little girl with especially big hair, Writer, Graphic Designer, Editor, Freelancer, Blogger, Inhaler of Chocolate
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Monday, April 16, 2007

I should be staring at the carpet instead...

It's a little odd for me, praying in public places, because I stand up for qiyaam and ruku, but I need a chair for sujjood. The ligaments in my right knee have been painfully troublesome ever since the accident in October, and if I pray sitting on the ground, my knee hurts so bad I have a hard time walking. I've been to a variety of orthopedic surgeons, each of which have prescribed me progressively bigger and bigger knee braces- the most recent one being a 'hinged knee brace' with enough padding, gears and velcro to make me look like a cross between a football player and a cyborg. It went from my calf to half-way up my thigh in all its immobilizational glory, and after trying it on over my pants (because there was no way it could fit inside) and feeling no better and no more immobilized than the previous brace, I decided to pass.

So I have another date with another Ortho, who will hopefully prescribe me something other than yet another brace, but in the mean time, half of my prayer is in a chair. And I know it must seem odd, a perfectly healthy-looking, Alhamdulillah, young, non-limping, non-pregnant woman walks into a masjid and pulls up a chair. The chairs are usually reserved for those who are old or extremely pregnant, and me being neither, sometimes people stare.

Sometimes, they turn around and stare alot. Last week, a woman sitting on the ground near me, who had finished her prayer, kept trying to look up into my face as if to ask, "What's your excuse?" Needless to say, that really makes concentrating on prayer difficult. Sometimes I wonder if I should have gotten the Cyborg Football Player From Outer Space leg brace just to make things obvious. Or maybe I should be paying more attention to my prayer. Heh

10 Comments:

At 16/4/07 7:21 PM, Blogger Chantale said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

 
At 16/4/07 7:22 PM, Blogger Chantale said...

I know exactly what you mean. Lupus people dont look in the least bit sick.. so me in a chair.. I get the look too. (been a few years now)
At Eid they always forget the chairs or good luck finding one so I pray on the ground and in a way it is cool but then it starts to hurt sooooo bad and I remember why I use a chair. Then I am stuck and have to use my neighbor to help me up and stuff.
Anyway hope you get better

 
At 16/4/07 8:09 PM, Anonymous hemlock said...

darling, the mosque is the house of Allah, and you are praying to and bowing for him. you neednt explain anything to anyone, because you dont NEED to.
and you dont need to feel guilty for anything either because He (swt) has given you the leeway.
i cant believe you'd get intimidated or upset by people who go to mosques so they can scrutinize and judge others.

 
At 17/4/07 12:15 AM, Blogger Saira said...

Awww, inshaAllah Allah will give you shifaa (through an effective Ortho).

It's a strange phenomenon, this. People can be nosy, and even quite unreasonably authoritarian. E.g. If a baby's crying, even, some people would shout louder than the poor thing just to tell the mothers off for bringing children in the masjid. It goes along the lines of "MAKING SUCH NOISE!" Oh, the irony...

And anyway, the fact that they don't realise that it's your prayer and you've chosen, for yourself, and your own reasons, to use a chair - doesn't matter. Because you know it ain't no biggie!

 
At 17/4/07 8:04 AM, Blogger Abez said...

Chantale: JazakAllah :)

Hemmie: Darling I'm not paranoid about it, but it kind of tarnishes the worship experience, and I like going to masjids, but only when there's no one else in them.

Saira: Lol @ MAKING SUCH NOiSE! I remember one Jummah when this one aunty had an all-out Ruckus, she started yelling at this one lady whose kids hadn't even MADE any noise, and then another stood up to defend the lady with kids (who looked mortified) and things got loud and escalated, and in about five minutes it sounded more like a fish market then a place of worship, subhanAllah

 
At 17/4/07 4:40 PM, Blogger afie911 said...

I know that feeling. Here in Malaysia the women have a special clothing to wear for prayers. We call it a "telekung". But me and my mum, we sometimes just wear the clothes that we are wearing with socks to cover-up our feet and even if it does seem normal to you perhaps, we'll get stared at sometimes. Hehhe. But I'm used to it to so, Alhamdulillah, it does not interfere with my prayers that much... well, maybe a tiny bit though. :D

 
At 18/4/07 1:50 AM, Blogger Abez said...

Arifah: That's really interesting about the special prayer telekung. In Pakistan people wear a shawl with their outfit called a dupatta, which is very seldom on your head, but if you're going to pray, you might use it to cove your head then.

Unless you're already wearing a hijab, and your dupatta is just a fashion accessory, but my sister and I managed to mortify people by praying fully dressed, with totally covering scarves but NO DUPATTAS!!! *gasp!*

 
At 18/4/07 10:27 AM, Anonymous Mona said...

god. that's awful, dealing with that in the mosque. haraam.
i would have had to face that for a while too, while i can't bend over from the incision pain. but haha, by the time i'm ready to pray, the incision should have healed.
but seriously, awful! people need to concentrate on their ibadah.

 
At 19/4/07 2:27 AM, Blogger Saira said...

Hahahahaa

You know what "haraam" reminded me of? Well, you don't, so I'll tell you.

My brother was giving out leaflets for an event in London organised by Islamic relief, and he got approached by a slightly older man...
"What is this? Is there music?"
"Well, there are nasheeds."
"Music is haraam brother."
"Well I'm sure you can ask the Islamic Relief people about the music - they know more than me, so..."
"Astaghfirullah, brother. Distributing HARAAM outside the mosque!"

Phew! I'm so grateful I just got polite "No, but Jazakillah"s with the sisters!

 
At 21/4/07 11:30 AM, Blogger DeOwl said...

Hehe, it's weird to have you describe me as 'your sister.'

Man, I pray where and when I can. It's better than not praying. Allah alone will judge. He knows my intentions. So if I look like a nutter, praying in my car, or in a hotel lounge, or with a randomly selected kiblah, so be it. Atleast I'm trying.

 

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